Posts Tagged With: dumb

“N-Word” Logic in Relationships

Yes, the word is uncomfortable for just about everyone save rappers, wannabe rappers, Klan members, and wannabe Klan members. I apologize in advance for my usage of the word as I do not find myself in any of the aforementioned sects listed previously. That word, nigga, is an ugly word. In any connotation, spelling, or circumstance it is a word that grates on the nerves of those that are intelligent and of higher thought. In short it is a word that paints its target as ignorant, slow or idiotic…

…so despite how ugly the word is, unfortunately it fits for today’s theme.

Nigger, Nigga, Niggah or any other of its spinoff spellings is not a person or a group of people, rather, the N-word is a mindset. It’s a state of mind that is so incredibly inane that you can’t help but think to yourself, “Man, that’s some Nigga type stuff right there!” Worse still is when you have groups of people that are ingrained into off-center ways of thinking so much so that what to regular people think is ridiculous is considered normal to them. This, ladies and gentlemen, we will deem nigga logic.

Buying pants big enough to sag and show your draws only to then stand around and hold them up with your free hand all day is dumb. If you bought them to sag around your knees why hold them up? Isn’t that defeating the purpose? Nigga Logic.

Complaining vehemently that you didn’t get the gig at company you interviewed with when you have 4 neck tattoos and you were fired from the last 3 jobs you had? Nigga Logic.

Saying that Nigga is an acronym for “Never Ignorant, Getting Goals Accomplished”? Nigga logic.

And then there’s this…

I was sitting around in a group of random people a few weeks back having drinks, talking loud about nothing in particular and partaking in overall general foolishness. As often in mixed gender company the conversation turned to relationships, specifically what people consider an ideal mate. Somewhere in that conversation I mentioned my age, thirtysomething, along with the fact that I have never been married and I don’t have any kids and not currently dating anyone. After that statement, the looks I got from the women there gathered were those reserved for someone that just admitted that he was an ax murderer and cuddles at night with the remains of his victims. Just for kicks I decided to inquire about the looks that now adorned the faces of the women there to see why I was getting the extra strength gas face from them. Here was the exchange…

Me: What’s that look for?

Girl #1: You don’t have ANY kids?

Me: Ummm, no.

Girl #2: And you’ve never been married? Along with no kids and you’re how old?

Me: [thirtysomething]

Girl #1: Something has to be wrong with you? Are you gay?

Me: I’m gay if I’m over thirty and never been married? You know that’s flawed thinking, right?

Girl #1: You don’t have any kids, dude. That’s suspect, something’s wrong with you.

It was at this point that I simply smiled, took a swig from my beverage and turned my attention to another conversation going on behind me simply because…

Nigga logic cannot be reasoned with.

Here’s the thing, things have become so twisted and thinking so absurd until anyone doing the right thing: finding a like-minded woman, asking her to be your bride, living together happily, and THEN having children after age thirty is deemed wrong or “gay”.  Apparently, the best way NOT to be considered gay in the city of Atlanta is to be married at least once but preferably a minimum of 2 times at this point in life OR along the way in my [thirtysomething] years of life have found 3-4 random women to impregnate. Then and only then will a man be considered regular or normal in this day in age.

Umm hmm.

And I’d consider that just an isolated incident of a couple of misguided chicks that have watched too much BET in their lifetime but I can’t because when I went to New Orleans for work a few weeks back and had a very similar conversation with some people that I met there I got the same “something must be wrong with you” statement that I got here in Atlanta from a young lady that I met there. Seems as though that line of logic extends beyond the Georgia state border; here I was thinking that I was being responsible by not having any kids and it turns out that I’m an outcast because of it. And it was here that I started to worry because if up is now down and down is now up I need to know. I mean, I can go out and just start going all NBA All Star and put a baby into any ol’ spare uterus if that means that makes me normal. If the way of nigga logic is now the rule rather than the far reaching exception then I can very well come to work tomorrow with the Atlanta skyline on my neck with a pair of jeans happily sagging away because God forbid I get left behind in the sweeping trends that make a person viable in society. But whatever I do I certainly don’t want to miss out on the woman of my dreams because I didn’t meet the previous marriage minimum that is now apparently the mandate.

But just when I open myself to this rapid reformation I remember where I come from and that belief won’t let me succumb to that thinking. As much as I have come to the realization that stupid thinking is running rampant I also know that there are other people like me that know what life is really about and that relationships don’t come with a minimum baby mama prerequisite. So I guess I’ll just hang in there and remain the responsible dude that I am, being safe at all turns and waiting on, not the perfect chick, but just the chick that’s just as screwed up as I am and then clubbing her over the head caveman style and taking her home.

In the meantime we’ve gotta keep these flawed thinkers from breeding.

~thanks for reading

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Categories: Atlanta, Humor, Relationships, So Incredibly Random | Tags: , , , , , , | 12 Comments

The Jillian Problem

Hey all. I’m a huge fan of the show Family Guy. A few seasons ago one of the characters, Brian, was in a relationship with a young lady named Jillian, a beautiful blonde with a nicely drawn body who was also about as dumb as a box of rocks. The back and forth between Brian, an intellectual, and Jillian, a half wit, was oft times hilarious and perfectly illustrated the lengths that some of us guys will go to just to have a beautiful woman on our arm…but is that illustration realistic or just for kicks and giggles by Seth MacFarlane and his crew of writers? According to a few friends of mine that situation is not too far from fiction.

I wrote a blog a few days ago that told of a roundtable with some of my friends, during that conversation there was a consensus that when we’re talking about the ideal woman we would much rather have a woman with intelligence. What I didn’t expect from sharing that was that a couple of my friends remarked that men wanting a intelligent woman wasn’t realistic, rather, men wanting a less than bright bulb as a mate has made some women act a little dumber than they are for the sake of getting attention from a man. In the case of Brian from the aforementioned Family Guy he knew going in that Jillian was a few doughnuts short of a dozen but he remained in the relationship because of her good looks and what I’m guessing might have been some great animated sex. Jillian wasn’t acting the part or dumbing herself down in order to gain the affections of a man, it’s simply who she was; but apparently something, likely desperation, is causing this to happen in real women in these times. I found that hard to believe but I’m told that this actually happens and I have no reason to think that my people would lie to me.

I won’t count myself as the smartest man on the planet, mySATscores didn’t blow any schools on my list away and my high school and collegiate GPA left a but to be desired but my subjects and verbs agree 97% of the time and I’ve read more than 17 books so I think that makes me a little intelligent. Even in my “tad bit intelligence” I can honestly say that I’ve never wanted a dumb girl, and more than that, I wouldn’t want an intelligent girl that was acting dumb just to get my affections. That seems incredibly, well, unintelligent. I asked around and the reasoning that I got was that men are intimidated by a woman that can hold her own mentally so women have to pump the brakes on their mental acumen in order to not chase guys away because Lord knows said woman will end up alone if she lets on that she’s interested in more than the color of her next pair of shoes. While there may be a little truth to the intimidation factor in some cases (I’ll go ahead and just speak for me here, I won’t assume other guys feel this way) I’ve still never wanted a dimwit, that’s just no fun, it’s like playing Madden against the kid down the street that was born with no thumbs, sure you win by a large margin but you know that your opponent was overmatched.

I’m guessing that some dudes would want a dull knife for obvious reasons (easier to coerce into horizontal dealings) but I would still like to think that guys are not at all the dinosaurs that we’re suggested to be. More than that, I would love to think that women aren’t falling victim to the fallacy that men aren’t willing to deal with a woman that actually chooses to use and take advantage of her brain so she chooses to play dumb just because. Is this true? Men, do you like an intelligent woman or do you chase after the lesser thans because they are an easier target? Women, are you true to yourself or are you “playing Jillian” and holding back who you truly are in order to keep your man options high? It seems odd to even have to ask this but since it was brought up to me I figured I might as well put it out there and see what sticks. Let me know what you think.

~thanks for reading

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Categories: Attempts at Seriousness, Relationships, So Incredibly Random | Tags: , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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